A Look at 2007

A Look at 2007 

Last January I wrote a blog entitled, “A Look at 2006”. I guess I forgot to reminisce on 2007 when the end of January finally rolled around again. With that said, 2007 was filled to the brim with events and drama, which made for a very long yet interesting year. So bear with me as there are many memories to revisit! J

~January~

-Pioneer, CA-

Starting a year off on rocking footing…I find myself struggling with an inner battle, turmoil over faith, and questioning what it is exactly that I want. Going from being confident in my beliefs, to stripping down to the bare basics in spirituality, and eventually loosing my footing. Fighting with my parents, trying to find my identity again and feeling the cold side of the real world. My first taste in the world of relationships, a girl at that, though it only lasted a week, 7 days (online that is). A real learning curb…and more…

~February~

-Pioneer, CA-

A second try at a relationship (online)…in the end it was 2½ months, but a rough 2½! …Valentines wasn’t all that great being we “broke up” the day before…missing him…and more…

 

~March~

-Pioneer, CA-

Being incredibly stupid and for the first time in my life, I wanted to run away from home. “Hiding” a relationship from my parents, or so I thought I was hiding it…anger and rage finds new meaning in my heart…more inner turmoil… dad has heart problems so we spent about a week in and out of the hospital. Questioning myself on my feelings for my “boyfriend” (?). Working at Barons, and HATING it to the N^th degree…and more…

~April~

-Pioneer, CA-

Finishing Drivers Ed! (the book work) and hoping to get my permit (funny thing is a year later, still don’t have it). Bought myself my first 3 CDs…finding out a friend has a huge crush on me! Falling in love with Sheryl, and finding she is like a second mom and close friend to me. Scheming up ludicrous “run-away” plans. Not sure what to do with my friend with a crush, and finding I have a crush in return. Finding out not all “natural” remedies actually help! Eventually the innocent “crush” turns into helplessly falling in love with her… and more…

~May~

-Pioneer, CA-

The girl wins my heart completely! I give up on my already broken and damned relationship with him. …Showing, or better yet, returning, my love whole-heartedly to a wonderful woman. Taking off symbolic ties to my past and telling her of my past, and confiding in her my actual age.  Dying my hair for the first time…RED! Our first “squabble”, of sorts. Contemplating flying out to Rhode Island.J Learning to confront and talk out problems/conflicts in a relationship…knowing when to put my foot down and not be a doormat…quitting my first job…and more…

~June~ 

May 31^st- June 7^th on the road to Texas…Stayed in a hotel for a week in Arlington…NOT FUN!!! First encounter with real life boys…getting a taste of freedom and lusting for more…Breaking her heart…making someone hurt over me…trying to move on, and failing for a long time (still not over her completely). Being heart-broken…and more…

~July~

-Mansfeild, TX-

First real-life date, being nervous as hell, shaking down to the bone. The chemistry was SO bad, I wanted to puke when I got my “first kiss”. Finding and getting a job all on my own at Panera. Working my ASS off at my new job, making neighborhood friends (levi!J)…feeling a lil bit lonely in a new place…a new guy catches my eye…fighting off and on with my mom…feeling left out…flirting with Cody…working 30-40 hours plus and becoming a workaholic…and more…

~August~

-Mansfeild, TX-

First time im asked for my number! First, second, third, and fourth dates with cody, first official boyfriend…offline!...being pushed to painful limits…saying “fuck curfew” a few too many times that I care to admit to. Turmoil at home with mom, fighting authority…and more…

~September~

-Mansfeild, TX- 

More fighting with the moms…sticking with my sister and bonding closer than ever with her…getting even bolder with my mom and challenging her constantly…and getting put back in my place each time…but getting that much closer to her…first time I get jealous over another girl…saying and thinking im in love with him (though in the end I was dead wrong!)…chopping my long hair off….sneaking around and breaking the rules (more than once)…getting my belly pierced!... getting dumped!!! Crushed!!!...and more…

 ~October~

-Mansfeild- 

On the 1^st I tried week for the first time, first and last time I try a cigarette…being heartbroken over cody, being afraid to accept “my other half”…being drivin into “cody withdrawls” {it sickens me to look back at that time sometimes, at how desperate I was… and idiotic}…trying (and failing) to get a group to go to a haunted house…get a job at Salt Grass Steak House, hosting…getting back with cody…thinking “THANK GOD” (stupid me!)…meeting nichole…and more…

~November~

-Mansfeild-

Quitting Panera…my friendship with nichole…who ends up becoming my first girl to girl kiss(at work in the bathroom, and I started that one…have to say I was fucking ecstatic about it too!)…getting fucked up and high…meeting amber and becoming best friends with her…sneaking out of the house at 4am…not getting caught….the cops…breaking up for the final time with cody…on the 20^th I turned legal! The 21^st went to a club, kissed a guy and regretting it dearly!...finding out I was dumped for another chic … getting drunk…and lots of drama…lost of fights…and more…

~December~

-Everywhere-

Fighting with cody more than once, trying to fuck with my friends brings out the ugly side in me!...cutting my hair too short and dying it BLACK!...quitting SG…first flight alone back home to California where I belong…rupturing my right ear…falling into depression…missing my old friends…crushing on my old girlfriend (ash) but knowing I could never have her kills me…crying myself to sleep on many nights…missing my mom…blogging…writing…poetry…and finding music is a remedy for many painful things…and more

 

…though I ended ’07 on a rough note I have come along way since then. I’ve come to terms with many things, put to rest and simply gotton over a lot of shit. Ive gotton healthier and started to work again…made friends…and found a healthy relationship…im happy

So that was my 2007 …2008 has a bright outlook…looking forwards to what ’08 has in store for me J